Reclaiming Self-Centeredness

by Olivia Jade. Photography by Deun Ivory.

the space between the heart and the mind:
a blue sky, a horizon, an ocean.

where the contemplation of existence lingers in winds of licorice
a moon drawing itself close in fetal position
the number nine in neon,
a cycle upon the tip of completion.

to sway between these polars can be the invitation of many things. where there is emptiness, there is a call for fulfillment. where there is void, there is an aching compassion for wholeness. the space between the heart and mind is home for rooting. a blue sky of opportunity, a horizon of promise, an ocean of consciousness - this is where true self exists.  


many of us spit out the word “self-centered” with thorns on our tongue. it’s beneficial to recognize that a flower grows from the same vine. in terms of healing and growth, of reclaiming ourselves and becoming comfortable in the same skin we once withered in, who else should we be centered in besides self?  

healing is revolutionary. to dance along the rhythm of revolution, let us redefine self-centeredness as a tool for liberation. let us displace the meaning that we’ve associated with ‘self-centered’ and emancipate ourselves from the conditioned, hardened lie that has wired us to believe that G*od exists outside of us. the center is the space for truth, feelings. this is not a space of survival, but thriving. to be centered in Self is to own our power, to call our vessels “home” for the soul.

self-centered is being balanced, focused, directed and clear about your Self.

who are you when you visualize the highest version of yourself? who are you right now? how do you wear alignment within and how do you carry it in your everyday life? what does that curated experience of wholeness look like for you? which values piece you together and fill you?

being the creator of our own life takes using the space between the heart and mind and using it as a balance beam, a canvas. authenticity lives there. our state of being relies on the responsible actions we take to release ourselves from the chains of victimization and actively work on regaining our power. creating equilibrium in our skin simply begins with owning the truth that we are continually approaching center. it is a constant work, a constant dance, a back and forth, a swaying. traveling amongst the hues of discovery is our journey to self.

when Self is not centered, it results in anxiousness, laziness, procrastination, a fixed mindset, and self judgment. many times, Self can feel like an unsafe space for us. after trauma, the compounded interest of years of misguided and muddled intuition, feeling like we made the wrong choices, having to reconnect to our bodies, and the inability to actively forgive ourselves can result in a mistrust of Self. it takes deep work to reconnect to who we are in the midst of radical healing.

why don’t i trust myself? what do i forgive myself for? what does trusting and loving myself look like?

awareness and method is key to becoming centered again; we must become aware of the implications that we are off-center in our moods, our triggers, our energy levels, and our mental state. what are the methods to center self? first, it’s imperative to recognize our own will. this not only begins to bring us back to ourselves, but it is the first seed of empowerment. second, we must choose for ourselves. this is giving ourselves the power. once we make a choice for ourselves that is in alignment with our betterment, we are actively telling Source that this is now our intention. thirdly, finding what feels good and doing more of those things - without expectation or explanation. this is where we begin to ground our feet in who we are; this is the unapologetic rootedness that gives us our depth. lastly, listening to our breath. many people are afraid of their own breath. when you run from your breath, this illustrates chasing winds that do not carry the song of your spirit’s promise. tapping in, centering in, is simply listening to the rhythm you are carrying in the present. is it tense? is it restricted? what thoughts are your breaths connected to? search. discover.

reclaiming the center for self means disassociating with our conditioned understanding of self-absorption; this opposite space is an extreme polarity that we must actively work on avoiding. this space is dead soil. on the multitudinous road to development, we find that balance is the key to alignment. it is essential to deconstruct the idea that taking time for self and centering who we are as a face of egotism. we are nothing but souls creating home in the vessels we’ve been gifted in this lifetime. it is not of anyone’s concern how you paint the interior for your own joy. within a scope of healing, unraveling who we are to reconstruct our sense of Self is not an option. the revolution is seeded in the revelation of who we are and what we are capable of. take your time finding your way back to center. move like you love yourSelf.

Olivia Jade is a writer. lover. creative strategist. Physically in Los Angeles and spiritually traveling, her rooted purpose is to create experiences for others to heal and connect to their highest self. her canvas of choice is vulnerable storytelling that blends the colors of self-development, music, wellness, and culture. 

connect with her: @akaoliviajade on Twitter and Instagram. for her blog posts and special offerings via her #virtuallovenote newsletter.