By LeeAnn Chisolm
I remember the first time I met God. I was a young, bright-eyed child who wanted to know the meaning of everything—the meaning of life, the meaning of death, even the meaning of my parent’s incessant rules. Often times, we would wander through the woods, find a spot to set a blanket, kick off our shoes and gaze up at the sky for hours just in awe of what was before us. I always brought my journal to explore all that I was experiencing.
It was here, on the pages of my journal, that I first connected with my higher source. In a true Conversations With God fashion, I started writing down questions. The same questions I would ask peering up to the ceiling as I lie in bed every night.
“Why am I here?”
“What happens when we die?”
“What is this thing called life?”
At one point, I experienced this overwhelming sense of fullness. It was so rich and complete that my questions dissipated and I knew nothing but peace. It was a transcendent wholeness that I knew could only be God. It was a God that I knew from my readings, from my early understanding of the Bible to the new age books my mother kept around the house. But religion never suited me. As much as I tried to find myself in whatever diety I was studying at any given time, the only thing that ever felt true was my intimate relationship with God. That was all I needed. That was my truth.
As time has gone on, our relationship still evolves. Many of the feelings I had as a child concerning spiritual matters, I can now properly articulate and even verify. Now I do not seek to understand the nature of my divinity, but to experience it. This universal God energy that goes by many names, resides in everything. We are, in essence, the expression of this creative energy. No judgement, no laws, just the love that permeates our beings and our lives.
What if we could look at everything that we do as a form of spirituality? Instead of some place we turn to for salvation, what if we could experience fellowship all around us and in every moment? Today, this is my relationship with God. It’s knowing that I can choose love and light in everything that I do. That I can empower you and in doing so, allow you to experience the God in me. That I can nourish my planet instead of starve it because it too is God. My life is the expression of this active relationship. We have our ups, we have our downs, but at the end of the day, I always remember my truth. In my moments of fear, worry, regret, I know God lives there too. There’s no moment or experience void of this eternal expression. In these moments, I have simply forgotten. I always have the choice to return to my truth.
In divulging my relationship, I hope to make it clear that I do not refute religion. I do not seek to devalue anyone else’s truth and their connection to our higher spirit. We are all entitled to our own truths. Regardless of our preferred dogma or beliefs, there is nothing more necessary in our lives than a consistent practice of spirituality and a relationship with our source that we work at, question, and let evolve. It is in loving myself and this world with all its facets and dualities that I experience God. Because divine love is all there is. After all, divine love is me.
LeeAnn Chisolm is a writer and an award-winning filmmaker. Born and raised in Germany, now residing in Atlanta, this self-proclaimed workaholic found her calling early on through the written word and performing arts. From photography to poetry, to dance and film, her art is a conscious effort to inspire, empower and simply be the change she wishes to see in the world. Check out LeeAnn’s latest projects on her website www.MissChisolm.com and follow her on Instagram @MissChisolm.